Missing the youth tournaments

I just read several blogs and emails regard the Rage tournament which seems to be taking over the once great pleasantly Friendship Cup (can you say politics?) Of course I just got back from Yosemite and really didn't want much to do with anything, let alone soccer. I was pissed enough that I had to go give a make up exam to one potential referee who failed the first time. Fortunately it wasn't a wasted trip and he passed with flying colors. If he had not rushed through the test in 20 minutes I think he would have scored much better but 84 is a good score.

Basically since I am putting the youth tournaments aside completely for the hunt of my assessments, I realized how much I loved doing the youth tournaments and how sorry I am for missing so much.

The amateur Soccer leagues have taking too much of my time and due to flu's and injuries I am fighting to get two more assessments to get my next grade or am going to have to write off the year until next year. The main question of the day is: Do I need the grade 5? Among my peers I'm one of the better referees. I did an NPSL center for the first time (Well I did NPSL for the first time). It was an eye opener. Good thing I didn't ask for an assessment or I would have walked away wondering if I failed or passed. But it told me that if I barely held my own there, would I survive the MLS? As much as I strive for that level of refereeing, I have had a lot of obstacles that have slowed my advancement such as balancing the family with refereeing. A lot of referees tell me I need to get out on the pitch more. Then I look at their relationship status. I have one friend who's wife could care less...nah... Indifferent is the better word. Not the best situation. That's the kind of marriage where one can up and leave. Others have not had a steady girlfriend. The FIFA referees, very few can maintain a relationship. I know two referees who's marriage broke up due to refereeing. The path to FIFA, or let along national seemed very clear when I was 14 years old. It was much clearer when I was single and had a girlfriend, a fiances, a bride. Then kids got involved. Changes everything. The path isn't so clear anymore. Do I want to go National, sacrifice a week at National Camp every year, spend the weekends of Spring, Summer, and early Fall refereeing out of state? If I were single, it would be clear, but I'm married with children.There is some self doubt whether I can do this. I have not been up on the physical fitness. I could just stop now, use the assessment I have now to maintain the grade I have now and coast through the rest of the year. Advantages of getting a grade 5:

Advantages of getting a grade 5:

1. One more step to National Referee after serving 2 years as a 5.
2. I would be the sole highest ranking referee in my city. Right now I share the spotlight of rank with two others.
3. It would give me top consideration for Far West Regionals being that rank is a process of elimination.
4. Can be picked to do more USL games until I qualify for MLS.

Looks like only 2 out of 4 are true motivators. The rest is just fame with no fortune.